A divorce is often a painful and stressful process for anyone to endure. Even with the best divorce attorney on your side and a great support system, it is still not an easy process. From a divided family to the possibility of losing your kids or home, a divorce can bring up intense emotions and cause people to make mistakes. Therefore, if you are in the process of getting a divorce, here are some of the mistakes you will want to avoid.
Taking Legal Advice from Other People Besides Your Attorney
When going through a divorce, close friends who have already gone through the process may offer advice. Note that they do this with the best intentions to help you navigate a difficult time. However, it is important not to take their advice without consulting your lawyer. Divorces are not the same. Each case is different. Something that may have worked for your friend will not work for you. For instance, if one spouse was in the military, things like asset division are bound by federal regulation. You, therefore, need a military divorce attorney to explain to you how the benefits are divided. The advice an attorney gives you depends on the facts of your case.
Bad Mouthing Your Ex to Your Kids
It is okay to be angry and hurt by what your spouse has done. But try your best not to bad-mouth your spouse to your kids. You may think you are venting, but you are hurting the kids. Plus, you could compromise your custody case in the future. If you want to rant, go to your friend or a family member. And if you feel like talking to the kids, just explain how the divorce process is going. Do not put the kids in the middle or try to pin them against your ex.
Allowing Your Emotions to Dictate Decisions
Most of the time, divorcing couples make significant life decisions based on emotions instead of logic. While strong emotions are expected in a divorce, do not give in to them and fight for things that are not important to you. It can be hard to detach your emotions from what is going on, but with the help of a good divorce attorney, you will be able to focus on your end goals.
Talking About Sensitive Information Online
It is one thing to vent about what is going on with your loved ones and another to post information online. Whatever you are feeling or thinking, resist the urge to post it on your social media account as that becomes a public record. Even if you have a private account, a private investigator can still get this information. Even something that may not seem related to the divorce, such as posting that expensive TV you just bought, can be evidence. Your spouse may use it as evidence that you have money to pay for alimony or child support.
Having Unrealistic Expectations
To come up with a solid agreement, couples need to adjust their expectations. If you argue about all the issues, refusing to compromise, you might end up in court. During negotiations, both couples should strive to meet on the middle ground and be reasonable and practical. This is a give-and-take, meaning you will not get all the cars, the house, or full custody of the kids simply because you want them. Plus, no divorce lawyer can assure you, you will get all these things. However, the attorney will work hard to come up with a strategy that ensures some of your expectations are met.
Making mistakes during a divorce process can make you lose your home or custody of the kids. It is better to listen to what your attorney tells you. This will make the process much more manageable for you.